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Messages - metsfan232

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Telling my wife about the diagnosis was hard enough, i felt weak and then the chemo made me weaker, unattractive, and i was unable to be the husband i wanted to be. That’s probably how he feels now too, like he cannot be there for you and is now pushing you away because he is uncomfortbale and frustrated with himself. My wife was in your same spot a year ago and started doing something that really helped, she would ask a simple question about how i was feeling, the diagnosis, or anything generally related to the cancer. If i shrugged her off with a non-answer she never asked another question or pushed it, but would just stay there and say that she was there to listen hen i wanted to talk. I dont know if this will help but what i am trying to say is dont push him to talk, but when you are together give him time to get comfortable in that type of convo and eventually say more to you.

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Off Topic Forum / how to have cancer and be a normal young adult
« on: September 03, 2019, 01:49:29 pm »
hi! So a quick recap of my situation: I’m 19 years old and was a sophomore in college when I was (unexpectedly) diagnosed. I study medicine so the scientific terms and medical stuff is less daunting (but obviously still scary when it’s about yourself), but what I’m having the hardest time with is the fact that I’m no longer just a young adult. It feels like from the second I was diagnosed, I became separate from my friends (not because of anything they did, they’re so so supportive). They’re worried about finals and keeping up with netflix and the new gossip, but it feels like overnight my priorities shifted and I wish they could just go back. It just feels like cancer ages you and it isn’t a disease for young people (even though I know it affects everyone), so now I don’t belong to the group of carefree college students because I have cancer but I don’t belong to the cancer community because I WAS just a carefree college student. I don’t know if this makes sense but I just wish there was an in between.

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